Maybe instead of fatality, mortal combat should offer brutality. It’s a skill, I promise. I think the roughness around my edges comes from either that serious personality disorder I joke about or my upbringing. I’m banking on the latter. I lived in the south Bronx for a while in the projects right off the Willis avenue bridge. One of my best friends used to joke that I had literally moved to the shit in the Bronx out of the entire county. Can I be honest? I never thought twice about it. I can’t explain why I’m not  unnerved but I felt like if I could survive living there then the rest of life was just a walk in the park. I’ve always been brutally honest, I’m not sure if I had a broken dim switch upstairs but mine was always on instead of dim. In school, I was the rebel. I had a uni brow once upon a time. This is a testament of how rebellious I was. For the longest, everyone thought shapelier eyebrows would make me stunning. The more they harassed me about it, the longer I fought it and wore the hell out of my uni-brow. I had them until about 16, when one day out of blue, I decided lets see what the new look is like. If people said anything about me like oh, her skirt is short. Tomorrow, I might come in a thong to show you just how short my skirt really is. Because I’m that asshole.

My friends used to get sort of offended when I would tell them shit. Do I look bad in this dress? Me: Yes, you’re not seriously contemplating walking in the street like that right? But I love him.. Me: Why? What constitutes this emotion of love? Because he’s a dick. I don’t know what to do? Me: Right, you’re acting like a fucking idiot right now. Yes, your stupid.

I know, how did I or do I manage to have friends. Believe me, I am thankful my friends, they tell me when I act like a train wreck or look like one. My friends are the first ones to tell me, listen, so when you speak to this person, try to be calm, normal, etc. I appreciate that. In time, I think most of my friends appreciate this honesty as well from me.

One time I was at work. There was this slacker that never really did shit. He always wanted to ignore people when they needed a viable answer. So what was my solution? I would email his boss in the first email to set the tone, you will answer me. He always did, and he ignored everyone else. I let him know from the beginning that I am not the one. However, one time he lost his mind and didn’t want to deal with one of his clients and told me to tell them something crazy. I of course, in true fashion, went nuts on him. I told him I didn’t give a damn what he did or what he told the client, I however was not partaking in his charade. A good friend of mine who worked with me, almost snapped her neck. She couldn’t believe I spoke to an attorney that way. Yes, I did.. Another time a client was looking for their medical records. He proceeded to tell me he lost them, not a care in the world. So I told him, I didn’t know what he was going to do but what I did know was that he’d better find them and that meant to start looking and I hung up. It wasn’t optional, find the shit.

I define brutality with the ability to check things. To keep things in real-time, really honest. People need that, a lot of times. I don’t think that lying to others serves any benefits other than ego stroking, as if we need any more narcissists in this world a la Kardahsian’s. If i have a client, I tell them what they’re expecting so that they can be well prepared. Denial sounds like a nice place to be but eventually the truth always surfaces, so why lie. Why tip toe around invisible lines that we create. Someone asked me the other day if I didn’t like someone and I very candidly answered, no, no I don’t. Why should I lie? To spare your feelings, like you’re a fragile piece of glass. In life, you need to be resilient. You will cross the paths of many who will either try to eat you alive, or drag you down to hell with them, I opt, I’m not doing either. What I am going to do is tell you how it is..





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